Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Dive school

I've been at dive school a week, the second week here is pool week, I'm learning how to scuba dive. The first day here I got a 700 on my afsoc which is the highest you can get. I aimed for honor grad and got a 88 on my test today so I can't get it but I was close. The rest of this week will be hard but fun then after this week things will be much more fun and intersting. I'm excited.

Saturday, December 20, 2014

The 20th of 2014 - heading home

Today was that day I've been dreaming of. You hear sounds that you've already connected with this day. I listen to these songs and they have previously connected me to this day and now it's hear and the anticipation makes it amazing because you are so excited about coming home to seeing your fiancé. To two weeks of complete adventure , a vacation but being in the military so pent up it only makes this better. Which now thinking about means there may be a downward spiral to it. I'm just so excited it's like a door of freedom has opened up. It's all the things I've been wanting to do, all the things I've needed. I can feel my heart beat with these moments. Only to make this better I practically have a playlist to go with it from the band bleachers who have me the songs to connect this moment early on. Today is that perfect day that day with so much different emotion good and bad. Wanting to go home, missing what you had and did, plus onto something new. I'll have a lot of these days in the military but this is my first one and it's amazing. I've been waiting so long to see my girl the best girl ever and some old friends. This will be a fun exodus a fun break and I can't wait to enjoy it. Today I got up at 9 packed up good then got to the airport for free luckily somehow. Then chilled with my buddies here and now about to head home for 7 hours then see my fiancé, and maybe my brother and his wife :)
It will be a fun good break I'm super excited.

Monday, December 15, 2014

Indoc graduate

I can't believe I made it. I've been dreaming of this for a year and I did it. I completed indoc holy crap. I now have to become a Pararescue man. I can't believe I've done this. I'm definitly a new man. God did this. I just am so mind blown now.

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Indoc day/week

Indoc schedule

4:00 - wake up and eat
6:00 - leave dorm and go to school house
6:30 - accountability and news of what we do 
7:00 - first exercise , run or functional fitness
Workout till 9
(If it's a Thursday we have alternate watercon and start out with a ruck then grass and gorillas then the pool)
10:00 - fin and swim
11:00 - go eat lunch
13:00 - watercon
(5 underwaters, buddy breathing, mask and snorkel recovery, treading water, underwater knots, equimpment recovery, drown proofing and sometimes equimpment tread.) 
It goes till 3:00
3:00 - classroom/debriefing 
Then they decide what happens or the days can change slightly. Evals are about the same thing. Evals are Mondays practice evals Fridays and random crap the rest. Wednesday can have lake swims Thursdays have alternates which means you do water con in clothing.
Indoc is the same thing over and over. It just gets harder then it ends or you fail.

Sweet disposition

http://husbandrevolution.com/why-marriage-cant-be-50-50-and-has-to-be-100-100/

I put this article in here because I think it's so true and good for marriage 
What I got out of it is neither one can say I love the person more or I do more just give your all and communicate on needs like if you have needs or they have needs tell eachother and you'll make it 100-100 because that's the truth there's no other way a marriage should be. 

Now the title of this blog is sweet disposition an amazing song by the timber trap I've always loved and ran to it for a year every morning. I miss those days I woke up at 7 and ran in my
Neighborhood through the cold and had my days scheduled out it was so much fun and so much adventure I never had a bad day. I miss running. I'm not
Lazy I'm too active and these weekends kill me with the boredom. Probably why I had that gay tinder fuck that I don't ever wanna lose Callie. Today I went to the pool used my snorkel and practiced water con. I will make another post on indoc to catch people up on what goes on in my life. So sweet disposition song has so much meaning to my days now it says never give up finish what you started always give your all carpe diem 
I love life there's so much to live for I miss home and late nights and longboarding on the streets I could longboard around here alone I night tomorrow. Anyway I've been having fun. So today I worked on buddy breathing and have our final evals Monday which I need to pass it all and get out of here. Callie and I are about to start premarital sessions of counseling which I think will help us and build us a lot so I'm very excited. Now I'm laying bored and blogging. I'll work on my indoc day blog now.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Callie

I've had a million broken hearts. I've had pain and misery but nothing compares or ever will to Callie. She's the most amazing women ever and I'll never find or want another women for none will ever compare to her. I have her my all I love her with my all I messed up bad more then once and yes it was a huge mess up. But I love that women more then anything I'll ever love in my life. I wish she knew me I wish I blogged and explained my thoughts and feelings earlier on. I need to keep blogging so I realize how I get to times like these. I love Callie I'll forever want her she made me believe in soulmates and I'll always believe she's my soulmate she kept me so happy Nd made my life amazing. I never thought this day would come I still don't want it and need it but I need to finish this course and I'm dealing with too much. More then the average guy here. Life is tough but it's a new tough when you go through indoc. Anyway I regret what I did I regret losing her ill hate myself for it for the rest of my life and I swear theses no women I'd rather be with or no women if even think is as good or close to her. She's perfect and my eyes and will always be I don't know how things will go this sucks because I wanted to marry her and spend the rest of my life with her. I messed up bad and I'll never do it again. Keep moving on that's all you can do in this life.

Friday, November 28, 2014

Going into my 8th week of the indoc course

Man I haven't freaking blogged in a while. But right now I'm a little worry bug. I've been stressed for so long going through this long course called indoc. God has a plan for my life I don't know what it is but I need to trust him. This week in indoc we have our last eval before our final one. I have to pass two events that I failed on the one before this. If I don't then ill have to retake this course and I really do not want to retake this course. So everyday I need to pray to God and trust in him that he will do wha he wants with my life. Just pass these two events and I will most likely be out of here. I need prayers I need God and I need all my wishes spent on this. This course is very tough and challenges the mind too. I hope to write more blogs again soon and it will be one about how I made it and succeeded through tough and scary times.